Fiction Scribe

Or,

Five Ways to Annoy Me (And Any Other Self-Respecting Writer, Agent, Editor, Etc)

Because sometimes things need repeating. These things will guarantee you a place on my bad side.

1. Email me in text/net speak.

Unless you’re paying me a certain dollar amount per page, I’m not here to be your editor. If you don’t respect me enough to clean up your writing, I don’t have the time.

2. Assume you are more important than everyone and everything else in my life.

If I get back to you later than intended, I will apologize for the delay. If you then decide that it’s okay to let me know how important you should be to me and/or how I need to change my behavior for you, then I will not be happy. The day you are that important is the day you become my agent or offer me millions of dollars to marry my unborn child.

3. Don’t do your research and pay attention.

I genuinely like helping people out when and where I can. I review books, I promote submissions calls and writing contests, I’m an online tour coordinator, I’m a freelance editor… If I can help you in any of these areas, I will. But I have my pet peeves and I’m also located in Australia, which makes some things different. Queries are fine (within reason). Assumptions (often followed by negative reactions) are annoying.

4. Assume that you’re doing me a favor.

Yes, I get extra publicity from book reviews, author interviews, etc, but I’m still taking time out of my life to ask you questions, read your book, promote your contest/call for submissions… The favor goes both ways.

5. Disregard or disrespect me because I work from home.

Just because I don’t have to dress up each and every day to get my work done doesn’t mean my work is any less than anyone else’s. I work hard to pay my bills and just because I do it in purple fuzzy slippers on cold days instead of high heels or steel-toed boots doesn’t make me any less of a worker.

In life as well as in the publishing industry, common sense, common courtesy, and paying attention will get you a long way.