Pet Peeve #14 - Paragraph Breaks
I love paragraph breaks. They’re so useful. They make things neat. They make things easier to read. Also, their misuse is a pet peeve which rarely grinds me because most people understand the art of the paragraph break. Rarely do you find
someone who
puts their paragraph breaks in such horrendously
wrong
places
as is demonstrated right now.
However, I have seen someone recently break the most basic rules of the paragraph break, and thus I must post about it.
The above is not attractive, but even less attractive is:
“So what do we do now?? Aaron asked. Eve raised her hand. “My house is closest.? Ariana tapped her foot on the ground. “Why don’t we go there? Maybe we can figure out what’s going on. Find someone to help.? Carlos clicked his heels together in front of her and saluted. “As you command!? She frowned. “Help how?? Aaron asked. “What’s going on?? Christopher laughed. “That meaning this isn’t all a dream?? Sunny cleared her throat. “Why don’t we walk? If this is a dream, it can’t hurt.? Suddenly, Eve stopped and stared at something behind Ariana. Her eyes went wide and she fainted. Christopher caught her and looked in the direction she looked and his mouth dropped open. Ariana’s hands started to shake and a chill ran down her spine. She slowly turned around and looked up. A huge creature stood about a yard in front of her.
The piece I saw wasn’t quite that bad, but I’d hazard a guess it was only so because three characters were involved whereas six are here. Not only is this aesthetically just…yuck, it’s hard, if not impossible to understand who is speaking in some places.
There are basic rules you should always remember about paragraph breaks:
When someone new speaks, s/he gets a brand new paragraph all his/her own. We authors are generous like that. (This doesn’t mean the first words have to be part of the dialogue which will be spoken.)
“So what do we do now?? Aaron asked.
Eve raised her hand. “My house is closest.?
When someone other than the current speaker has an action, bam! New paragraph.
Carlos clicked his heels together in front of her and saluted. “As you command!?
She frowned.
If you have something like “suddenly,? “without warning,? “however,? or “all in all? starting a sentence, it should likely be starting a new paragraph as well. Imagine it being like a camera suddenly moving to another piece of action. The paragraph is the moment between what you were reading and the next action.
“Why don’t we walk? If this is a dream, it can’t hurt.?
Suddenly, Eve stopped and stared at something behind Ariana.
If one of your characters has a small movement while another is speaking, and you’d rather not put in breaks, try turning something like this:
“Thank you all for coming here today,? Senator Spencer said. “I realize these aren’t the best of times, and your time is more valuable than ever.?
Peter chewed on his thumbnail as the Senator spoke.
“Today I’m here to talk to you about a pressing issue which can and will play a part in all your lives in the coming years.?
into something like:
“Thank you all for coming here today,? Senator Spencer said, completely oblivious to Peter chewing on his thumbnail while staring at her with complete loathing. “I realize these aren’t the best of times, and your time is more valuable than ever. Today I’m here to talk to you about a pressing issue which can and will play a part in all your lives in the coming years.?
(Both are acceptable; everything depends on the flow of your writing and how fast you want things to move.)
Paragraph breaks are still the same as most things are in the writing arena – flexible. However, they aren’t as flexible as other things, and you should be careful with them. Whether typing or writing, you should cultivate your inner editor to give you a little alarm when your paragraph is getting too long. For me, the sensation is one of slight discomfort. I frown at what I’m working on for about three seconds before penning in the paragraph symbol or pressing the “enter? key.
Quick tip: Don’t forget about what medium you piece will ultimately be in. When working on a newsletter, one sentence can be more than enough for newsletter paragraph length. For blogging, I usually use more breaks than when writing one of my novels. Readability is key.
March 13th, 2007 at 10:57 am
Yes, yes, YES!! This makes me absolutely crazy, too. And it happens in published books all the damn time. If another character is taking action, they get their own damn paragraph, people! Don’t make JM and me have to come out of cyberspace!
March 13th, 2007 at 3:57 pm
Sad that we have to teach adults this, isn’t it?
Thanks, though, for pointing out the importance of paragraph size in the medium in which it’s published. Nice touch.
March 13th, 2007 at 6:09 pm
Sandi - I’m glad you like me pointing it out. There are some things that are so annoying, and this one is it!
Susan - Sad, but it has to be done. Thank you. It is very important in which medium things are published.
March 14th, 2007 at 6:57 am
“…We authors are generous like that.”
[chuckle]
Thanks for the tip. While I’m no where near as awful as your first example, I’m well aware that there is always room for improvement.
Found you through MyBlogLog, btw.
Great blog! I’ll be back.
March 14th, 2007 at 5:10 pm
I’m glad you liked that bit. I’m glad you’re not at the level of the first example! I hope no one is.
My BlogLog? Awesome.
Thanks for stopping by.
March 27th, 2007 at 10:40 am
Excellent illustration!
~going to check to see if I’ve committed~
March 27th, 2007 at 6:55 pm
Thank you!
May 19th, 2007 at 10:07 pm
[...] BSG Fan Fiction May 19th, 2007 by Margie Fan fiction seems especially popular among fans of science fiction television shows, and while I am not much of a fan fiction kinda gal myself I understand the struggle of getting something readable to travel from your mind to the blank computer screen. If you are a fanfic writer, or just thinking about wading in to the fanfic ocean, head over to fictionscribe.com for posts about the importance of paragraphs or reminders that details make a good story even better, but redundant details are just silly. [...]