Fiction Scribe

Hello everyone!

Today I have a real treat of an interview for you. The lovely authors who wrote The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Enhancing Sexual Desire are here today answering questions about the book. I hope you’ll join me in welcoming them to the site.

Hello and thank you for stopping at Fiction Scribe, Rachel and Judy. Tell the readers a bit about yourself.

Rachel: I have worked as a social worker/therapist in the past, and right now I am a stay-at-home mother of two small children (ages 5 and 2) and a freelance writer.

What brought you into the world of writing? When did you start?

Rachel: I have been writing since the age of seven. I had an amazing second grade teacher who encouraged all of us to write poetry, and that’s when the love of writing all started for me. After that, I had lots of encouraging teachers, and I was an English Major and Sociology minor in college.

When I got married in 1990 and moved from New York to Massachusetts, I took an adult ed. creative writing course with the amazing short story writer and novelist Melanie Rae Thon. Melanie in turn introduced me to the late and much missed short story writer Andre Dubus, and I had the great good fortune of taking part in a Thursday night writing workshop that he ran out of his home in Haverhill, Massachusetts up until his untimely death. I tried to write fiction, especially during the time I was in Andre’s group, but I feel much more comfortable writing nonfiction, especially self-help books, so that is what I focus on now.

You’re currently on virtual tour for your book The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Enhancing Sexual Desire. Could you tell us a bit about the book?

Rachel: We are so excited about this book. Our approach is very positive, very joyful and playful. People get very busy and very stressed out, and sometimes, as a result of fatigue and stress and a general feeling of being sort of over-scheduled and overwhelmed by life, they may neglect their relationship with their partners, or allow it to drop to the bottom of their “priority list� (well below children, careers, community involvement, hobbies, social obligations, etc.). Our book offers readers a powerful reminder to make time and save energy for each other, both in the bedroom and outside of it.

What inspired you to write this book? Where did the idea begin?

Rachel: Our literary agent, Andrea Hurst, knew that both Judy and I have a strong interest in writing about all facets of human relationships. For instance, Judy has written several books about family life, and I had written a previous book (now only available as an e-book) about anger management in the context of intimate relationships. So Andrea mentioned to us that the editors of The Complete Idiot’s Guide series were looking for a book on this topic, and we both jumped at the chance and feel so grateful to have had this opportunity to work together on such a worthwhile subject.

Did you ever feel a bit hesitant about writing what would obviously be a bit of a ‘blush and giggle’ book?

Rachel: I may have had a few moments of blushing, but as Judy and I have discussed often with each other and with our editors how this is not a Kama Sutra book about positions and body parts and what goes where. It is not a graphic or explicit book. There are other books on the market that serve that purpose very well.

Rather, this book is intended for monogamous couples who have been together for a while – perhaps for many years – who are already keenly aware of each other’s bodies and pleasures, and who don’t need a “Sexuality 101� book, but who need some ideas for reinvigorating ALL dimensions of their intimate relationship (physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual) in order to keep feeling as powerfully bonded and unified as they did during the earliest phases of their relationship. This is why we focus so much attention, for example, on the importance of feeling connected to your partner on an emotional level in order to feel greater sexual desire.

What is your favourite part of the book?

Rachel: I love the part of the book where we focus being in touch with your sensual side, enjoying your skin, and “pampering� yourself. The relationship between loving self-care and a strong self-esteem and a keen sense of sexual desire are all inter-related (particularly for women, but for men, too), and we offer a nice variety of tips in this area.

What makes this book different from the multitudes of sex and love books out there?

Rachel: For starters, the positive, playful, joyful tone and the emphasis on keeping sex a playful part of your life and a source of great joy. As Judy often says, sex is one of the greatest ways that adults “play.� So many sex books take a very technical approach, minimizing the emotional dimension, and certainly minimizing the joyful, playful dimension, almost treating it as a “task to master,� and I think that approach makes it almost like a competitive sport rather than a source of pure, undiluted joy.

What are you working on now?

Rachel: In keeping with my interests in writing about counseling and social work and “self-help� issues of all kinds, I am currently under contract with Penguin/Alpha (the publisher of this book) to write a handbook for people who are contemplating becoming foster parents. I am working with the staff of the National Foster Parent Association, and it has been a truly fascinating experience so far.

What are your dreams for your writing?

Rachel: To keep writing forever! I’d love to write fiction, and have tried my hand at it, but I think that, at least at the moment, I feel more comfortable writing nonfiction. I love writing in the self help category about issues that feel important to me.

When you’re not writing books, what do you do? How do you find time to write?

Rachel: As I mentioned earlier, I am the parent of small children, so most of the time I am taking care of them. I am very fortunate to have family nearby. My parents take care of my children twice a week, and while I probably should use that time to run errands and get stuff done around the house, that is my writing time. I also like to write at night, sometimes quite late, and on the weekends.

Do you have any advice for writers?

Keep going!! It gets hard at times, but persistence pays off. Also, if you get overwhelmed by any one project, don’t hesitate to set it aside for a while and work on something else. You can always come back to it later with “fresh eyes.� Also, do it because you love it, not for any other reason.

Thank you very much for your time.